Dad's Eulogy

This is the eulogy that my daughter, Sarah, read at my father's graveside service in Hopkins, Missouri, on Saturday, October 4, 2014. It was written by Holly (my sister), Sarah, and me...

Grandpa was well-loved by family, friends, and co-workers and loved them back until his heart gave out.

He was born here in Hopkins, and was raised in Bedford, Iowa. He loved it and spoke so fondly of it. Sometimes, we would be in conversation about this place and his mind would wander off and you could see in his eyes that he was transported back here. He told all of us that even though he moved away, he remained a country boy his whole life.

As a man of many talents, he joined the Army, earned his Masters in Education, taught Industrial Arts and served as Principal, in addition to working as a Warehouse Inspector for the USDA. His experiences gave him lots of colorful stories which he loved to share. In his retirement, he called his buddies and encouraged them to join him as drivers for Enterprise Rent-A-Car. It was so typical of him to figure out how to have fun with old friends and make new friends at work when he wasn't relaxing and entertaining them on his back porch in Florence, South Carolina.

Grandpa joked all the time. He was happy and funny and liked to make people laugh. There were few times when he wasn't laughing, which was just one of the many reasons he was such great company to keep.

His love for family was unrivaled. As many of you know, he was very close with many nieces and nephews and was always there to give a helping hand.

A loving father, Grandpa helped bring Holly and my mom together over 18 years ago. When visiting Holly and her family for the first time, he bought her an outdoor grill and taught her how to use it. (many of you know how much he loved to grill - he definitely wasn't a shy carnivore!) Although they lived on opposite sides of the country, they had a great relationship. Holly learned about taking life as it comes from their talks and enjoyed his attitude about dealing with the inevitable bumps and bruises life dishes out. He always left her looking forward to visiting again someday. Holly's daughter, Pam, was able to meet him in Kentucky, which helped develop their relationship. They shared a love for the south that other family members didn't seem to appreciate, and he loved getting pictures of her children.

Grandpa was so proud not only that my sister, April, had become a third generation teacher, but that she had become such a kind, caring and brave young woman. He loved nothing more than to bring her up in conversation, and admired the passion she brings to everything she does.

He and I shared many things in common. The greatest common factor of our relationship was our humor and silliness, which I must have inherited from him. We could enjoy ourselves doing just about nothing, and I always loved and will cherish his stories. The greatest gift he ever gave to me was only a few, short weeks ago, and was the major kick in the pants "time to be an adult" talk that I absolutely needed. And that was just the thing - he always knew exactly what to say.

He not only gave my mom a sister, but also unconditional love. For the past 20 years, I've had the privilege of knowing the depth of their relationship from various hardships, times of celebration, hurt and happiness. His support was unwavering. There wasn't a single day that they let pass by without talking on the phone, sometimes more than once. He was her rock, her cheerleader, her confidante. He was her compass, as he will continue to be. He was her Person, but more than that, she was his Person. He was her dad, the best one she could have ever asked for.

We love and will miss you, Grandpa.

Don't Worry, Be Happy

I’m not an isolationist. I do desire companionship. However, living off the grid, more than I have at any time in my life, my life here in Southwestern North Dakota is pretty darn perfect. I am 2 ½ miles from the nearest neighbor. I must use the tractor to clear snow drifts so that I can drive out in my jeep or the 4-wheeler.

Often, it is below zero and I stay in the house for days. I am totally self-sufficient and could go several weeks without any need from the outside, maybe more. I go to “town” about once per week and town is Dickinson, 35 miles away.> I live out here alone with my dog. There is no fear. I have guns. I have food. I have a generator.

I have tractors. I have freedom from civilization. I have plenty of space for visitors to stay. I have plenty of wild game. I have silence. I have freedom. My dad calls me every day. My Uncle Bud, dad’s brother, calls me every week. I hear from my daughters fairly regularly. I have cable TV, cell phone, internet, electricity, and propane heat. I have everything I need to live… and nothing more… which is freedom.

Some people call this sort of living Extremist. I disagree. I think this is the way life was supposed to be lived. Am I not living the American dream (21^st century taken into consideration)? Without the “noise” of civilization, not even an airplane overhead, one can surely come in to an understanding of the true self. And, I’ve realized that I like who I am and I am not in a hurry to change who I am. I just need to find someone else who accepts me as who I am, because I will never be comfortable with crowds, cities, and noise. I was born for this.