Five Percent

"Let me know if you need anything."

"We're here for you."

"This is a huge mistake."

"I just don't understand why."

"Are you sure about this?"

They seem like harmless words, well meaning sentiments, but they carve through my confidence. The truth is that I do need something, encouragement. I hope my friends and family will always be there for me, in a non-judgmental way; I don't want their sympathy. I want their support. The truth is that nobody needs to understand why, and if I weren't sure about this, I wouldn't do it.

I married John because I love him, he's a hard worker and a deep thinker, and he has that adventurous spirit that I've been searching for, not to mention the fact that he's outrageously handsome! Our relationship hasn't been easy. It's been downright difficult, but that doesn't diminish the reasons that I married him. We both come with scars and idiosyncrasies and baggage. He tends to wear his on his sleeve more than I do, but I'm no picnic either. Getting a good dose of counseling and staying away from alcohol has worked wonders. We're in this for the long haul. I have definitely done my share of dating over that past 16 years of being single. I know what I want. John is that person.

I'm not ready to walk away. These days, folks find it much too easy to walk away. That may seem like the wise path, but I'm not so sure. I know the statistics. I know our chances are not good. Hell, there's probably a 95% chance that this won't work. Guess what? I'm in it for the 5%. I believe in the 5%.

You see, a little over a year ago, when my dad went in for heart surgery, the doc said that there was only a 5% chance that anything would go wrong. Dad was in the 5%. That experience has made me see things differently. I think about the 5% now. I know how much life-changing impact lies within the 5%. I have to believe that those chances can work in my favor as well as against it.

So, believe. If you can't believe, trust. If you can't trust, encourage.

"That's great!"

"I'm happy to hear that."

"Let me know if you guys need anything."

"You have to follow your heart."

"We'll have to get together when he gets back."